The Notting-Hill-Killer, Jonathan Bird, has been arrested and jailed for a series of cold blood killings. But soon reporter Susan Moore is telephoned by a stranger claiming the police arrested the wrong man and that he is the “real” Notting-Hill-Killer. As the body count rises, Susan finds herself struggling to solve the mystery and unmask the true killer.

Wow, this movie sucks. “Murder on Line One” (aka “Deadline”) is an extremely boring serial killer thriller that tries to pass itself off on the VHS box as some sort of slasher. The film is more of a police procedural than a horror film. The majority of the killer’s attacks involve him hit someone over the head with a baseball bat as a cartoon sound effect plays. The film was shot with a bluish hue that makes it hard to see what the hell is going on. There isn’t much gore and the killings are mostly off screen. The killer spends most of his screen time in his loft, either cutting up photos, burning photos, smoking cigarettes, or drinking tea. The twist ending is pretty weak and you can see it coming a mile away.

The acting is fair but none of the characters are interesting or appealing enough to keep your attention. The director (who also directed “Unmasked Part 25”) shoots the film like a TV movie. There are some pretty impressive shots early on of the busy city but after that, most of “Murder on Line One” takes place in a police station. The film also features a headache inducing score. On the cover of the VHS box the killer is seen holding a giant “Halloween” type kitchen knife…he never uses one in the film. Overall, I’d say stay away from this one. “Murder on Line One” doesn’t feature any of the goodies that make some “bad” 80’s horror films worth watching.

“Murder on Line One” features strangulation, a shower scene, gunplay, a twist ending, a severed head, and one of the longest opening credits scrolls of all time.

GORE SCORE-1/5

Tit-O-Meter-0/5

Academy Entertainment/103mins